Dr Phil: Should I Get a Divorce from My OCD Wife?
Dr Phil’s latest episode asked everyone to think about the marital vows that promise to be there “in sickness and in health.” A marriage is typically a happy beginning, so you’re not likely to be considering the worst case scenarios as you make that promise. That’s what happened to Brian, who is now considering a divorce from his wife due to her extreme Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD).
Laura’s problems with the condition date back at least six years, to the birth of the couple’s second child. Now she has a list of 91 rituals and fears that fill her days. Though Brian does not want to go that route, he is seriously contemplating leaving the marriage due to the strain that her OCD has caused. She even has to bind her hands and feet every night, out of the fear that she could hurt someone in her sleep.
Dr Phil: Examples of OCD Behavior
Dr Phil counseled Laura, a wife and mother whose severe Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) is keeping her from enjoying daily life with her family. (Lightspring / Shutterstock.com)
Laura recalled feeling confident and successful in her life before her battle with OCD began. She had a positive opinion of herself, but that has changed since her condition has taken its toll. She demonstrated how she portions out four-ounce drinks of water using a spoon.
She also spoke about how her OCD has affected her family life. She knows that it is hard on her husband Brian, who is shouldering most of the family responsibilities. When she feels “intrusive thoughts,” she has to “detox” by taking vitamin supplements.
Dr Phil: OCD Fear of Chemicals
When she sat on Dr Phil’s stage, Laura described herself as “nervous” and outside her “comfort zone.” But she was determined to change her life to help herself and her family. She is fixated on the number four, which she uses to help control her anxiety. She tapped her leg to cope as Dr Phil asked her questions.
Laura’s list of fears includes foods that touch aluminum foil, aerosol deodorants and sprays, scented candles, dryer sheets, and plenty of other chemicals. During the conversation, Laura took a break to write rows of the number four to help herself remain calm. Also on her list of triggers is pregnant women. She explained that she blamed herself for the birth defects or failed pregnancies of friends, which she said she knows intellectually is irrational.
Dr Phil: Why Did She Hide OCD From Her Parents?
Laura can sometimes be afraid of her intrusive thoughts. As Dr Phil continued to calmly discuss her situation, she cleaned her hands using a hand sanitizer spray. What do Laura’s parents think about her current situation?
“I’m just so sorry. I feel I’ve missed the boat,” her mother said. Her father Larry said he was proud of her for taking steps to get help. Laura admitted that she kept it to herself for a long time because she did not want her parents to worry or judge her for her OCD.
Dr Phil: Obsessive Compulsive Disorder Definition
What is Obsessive Compulsive Disorder? Dr Phil shared the following definition:
Characterized by obsessive (persistent/intrusive) thoughts and compulsive, repetitive behaviors that are time-consuming or cause significant distress/impairment. May involve dysfunctional beliefs, an inflated sense of responsibility, overestimating threat; perfectionism; intolerance; and over-importance of thoughts.
“‘Obsessive’ refers to thought and ‘compulsive’ refers to behavior,” Dr Phil said, explaining a distinction. If you think you or someone else exhibits these types of characteristics for more than one hour per day, that can be a sign of OCD.
Dr Phil: OCD Treatment Options
Dr Phil invited Dr Charles Sophy to join him on the stage so they could explain how OCD affects a person’s brain. For people living with OCD, the brain is unable to filter out unimportant thoughts. Instead, every impulse gets through, which can lead to a disproportionate response.
As Dr Phil and Dr Sophy explained, OCD is not something that people can just “fix” in themselves. There are physical factors that come into play. However, Dr Phil said there are some options to help Laura manage her day-to-day life. Some SSRI medications could be a part of that plan.
It was brave of Laura to share her story. Let’s hope it is a first step toward an easier life for her. Talk about this episode with the hashtag #Married2OCD. If you think you or someone you know might have OCD, consult the International OCD Foundation or visit Beyond OCD to learn about next steps and resources available near you.
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