Dr Phil: The Co-Eds and the Catfish
Dr Phil shed his spotlight on one of the most elaborate catfish cases his show has ever come across. Typically, Dr Phil’s dating scam stories involve middle aged adults who are lonely and susceptible to kind words from strangers. But in this case, the victims were young women, primarily college students. And there were not just two or three, but seven women in total who had been deceived by a stranger on the Internet.
Why did these women, many of them students at Brigham Young University, all fall for the same pattern of behavior from a man who claimed that he loved each of them? The women’s stories were romantic, and they said they were open and honest with him about their personal lives. You can imagine how betrayed they must have felt to learn that there was more going on than met the eye.
Dr Phil: Catfish Uses Multiple Fake Personas
Dr Phil had some shocking twists and truths for seven women who were all catfished and deceived by the same stranger in an elaborate online dating scam. (93482748@N02 / flickr)
Dr Phil introduced the assembled group to “the man you had feelings for,” but he was an innocent victim in the scam as well. He had his digital identity stolen and the catfish used this man’s photographs to create multiple fake personas, with names like Hyrum and Hunter. It had to be a letdown to see the real person behind the photos, only to discover that he was false advertising.
In terms of being a catfish, I find it impressive that someone could maintain seven fictional romances and even attempt to keep the details straight. Yet all seven of this man’s victims indicated that they loved him, or they thought he loved them. “It almost seemed too good to be true,” Hillary, one of the victims, said. That’s exactly because it was too good to be true.
Dr Phil: Prince Charming Steals Hearts — Online Deception
Whitley admitted that she appreciated getting attention from the man she thought was Hyrum. However, you don’t feel quite as special when you learn that your Prince Charming was also romancing six other women simultaneously. Have you ever had your heart stolen by someone who was not what they appeared to be?
The women’s expressions when they saw “the man of [their] dreams” were priceless. The woman who revealed herself did not bear even a passing resemblance to the man whose photographs were used in Hunter and Hyrum’s online profiles. As you can imagine, the ladies had plenty of questions for her.
Dr Phil: The Woman Behind a Scandalous Catfish Scheme
Dr Phil questioned the woman behind this elaborate catfish to learn that her motives were questioning whether she was romantically interested in women and if she should give up her religious faith. “Being gay and being Mormon is hard,” Kayla/Hyrum/Hunter told the women. “I’m not here to justify what I did.” Later, she added an apology: “I’m sorry that I dragged you guys into my mess.”
Dr Phil pointed out to Kayla that each of the seven woman did enjoy connecting with her, even though they thought she looked like someone else. The women were gracious and supportive as they shared some feedback with Kayla, the overwhelming majority of it positive. Could you be as forgiving as these young women? Dr Phil also praised Kayla for facing up to the people she deceived, and reminded everyone about the healing power of forgiveness.
Dr Phil: How To Avoid Being Catfished
What can all of us learn from this situation? The best thing anyone can take away from other people’s experiences with crushed hopes and dreams is a lesson on how to avoid being in that same situation. Though sometimes heartbreak is a part of authentic relationships, you can learn when not to let your guard down. Online dating has become a popular way for single to meet and connect, but the best advice is to take the relationship offline and into the real world when you feel that spark.
If someone is in a distant location (such as a foreign country) or is hesitant to meet you in a public place (such as a coffee shop or restaurant), that is a red flag that you should be on alert. Be suspicious of any hard luck stories or requests for money, especially if they come early in your communications. Use tools like Google Image reverse search to check their profile picture and other photos, so you can determine whether these images belong to someone else.
When you have a sense that something is not quite right, pay attention to it. Don’t be bowled over by the heady early days of new romance. Look at the person’s social media profile history to determine whether this is a real account or one that was recently opened by a scam artist. Lastly, don’t rush into anything. If this online stranger is really your one true love, you have plenty of time to get to know each other and begin a new chapter in your lives. Don’t make any rash decisions you can’t undo, especially when it comes to finances.
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