Dr Phil: A Family Divided
Previously, Dr Phil met Lisa, a woman concerned that her father Carl cheated her and her sisters out of their portion of a family inheritance. The story involved pettiness, a potential mail-order bride/catfish, and plenty of hurt feelings. But it didn’t end there. Lisa also wanted to call her dad out for planning to skip her upcoming wedding in Cancun, Mexico.
In a pre-interview, Carl said that he did not want to spend $1,500 to travel to his daughter’s wedding. Lisa has taken offense to that, because he has traveled to the Ukraine on two occasions already in search of a mail-order bride. Carl’s ex Kathy, who is Lisa’s mother, was offended on their daughter’s behalf.
Dr Phil: Family Won’t Attend Destination Wedding
Speaking in his defense, Carl admitted that he does not feel like a part of the family due to the ongoing conflict. Lisa can’t help but take it personally. “It is really devastating,” Lisa said. Dr Phil pointed out that coming to the wedding would be much more affordable than going back to the Ukraine, so obviously this is about other things, as Carl mentioned.
Carl said he tried to talk Lisa into having the wedding somewhere closer to home, which didn’t work out. April, Lisa’s sister, has firmly taken Carl side. She said she could not afford to spend “four months’ rent” to attend Lisa’s nuptials, which are apparently a five-day event. I want to know where April is paying rent and how I can get in on those rock bottom prices.
Dr Phil: Family Resents Expensive Wedding
April said she thought choosing to have the wedding in Cancun, when that creates a burden on many of the guests, was a selfish move on Lisa’s part. “You could have had a wedding here and gone to Cancun for your honeymoon,” Lisa said.
April also pointed out that the family spending that much time stuck together was a recipe for drama. Lisa said they planned the wedding two years in advance to give people who wanted to come the time to plan ahead. She also said the $1,500 price tag is all-inclusive, with flights! I will gladly come to your wedding, Lisa.
Dr Phil: He Doesn’t Think He’s The Dad
But the best was yet to come. Carl has apparently been harboring suspicions all his life that Lisa and her twin sister Jennifer may not be his biological children. Carl said he never meant to say it out loud, and he loves all the daughters regardless. Apparently, Kathy and Carl spent some time apart, and he has always been skeptical about the timeline of her pregnancy.
Jennifer said she does not think it is true, and Lisa agreed that either way, he is still their father. When Kathy tried to pile on Carl, Lisa pointed out that Kathy is no prize either. Kathy once said that she didn’t need a relationship with Lisa, because she has three other daughters. Dr Phil wondered whether any of these family members get along individually.
Dr Phil: Too Drunk To Fly?
Peacekeeping sister Ciera said that she gets along well with everyone in her family. “I have different relationships with all of them,” Ciera said. Carl complained that the family is always fighting about the past. Lisa said that is because old wounds have never been addressed and resolved. April said that when the family attempts to confront something, drugs or alcohol are always involved.
What happened the last time the entire family reunited? It was Ciera’s college graduation, which was also Father’s Day weekend. Kathy prepared a big meal, but Carl’s plane was delayed and he had three glasses of wine at the airport. He was escorted off the plane and missed the family event. It seemed to take a toll on the day for everyone, though Kathy said it was not surprising.
Dr Phil: Father-Daughter Peace?
Dr Phil pointed out that there has been a common thread of drinking that sets Carl off many of the situations. He said that he still thinks that everyone was overreacting to his behavior at the airport, and he noted that he didn’t miss the actual graduation, only the Father’s Day meal beforehand.
When Dr Phil asked Carl whether he was drunk for his Dr Phil appearance, he dodged the question with some jokes about alcoholic behavior, which only made Dr Phil roll his eyes. Lisa expressed that she is hurt by everything that has happened in their relationship. Carl responded by implying that Lisa is overly sensitive. Hopefully this family is on a path to more peace in the future.
Dr Phil: Making Up with Dad
If you’d like to be closer to your father, here are some words of wisdom that Dr Phil might suggest to help you take first steps toward repairing or rebuilding that relationship.
- Communicate. Think about what you want and what you are willing to give in return.
- Heal. Give yourself the validation and support that you may not always feel from others.
- Forgive. Be willing to forge ahead and develop a new relationship with your dad.
For a more guided, step-by-step approach, pick up Dr Phil’s book The Family First Workbook: Specific Tools, Strategies, and Skills for Creating a Phenomenal Family.